Got to Love Ed
by lovelyfma
Summary: Thanks to a certain someone, everyone and their dog whom lives in Amestris now knows, that the Fullmetal Alchemist Edward Elric... is gay. Ed gets thrown into a confusing adventure as all sorts of male FMA characters try their luck at making Ed fall for them.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist, end Disclaimer.

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><p>While taking a nice relaxing stroll through the countryside that is Risembool, Ed has a very philosophical little chat with himself about his eventual future.<p>

'Ah Risembool...' He took a deep breath of the crisp clean air, "Ah"

'...Gosh it's so boring here... Now that Al's back in his old body maybe it's about time I found some sort of a purpose other then living in this little village for the rest of my life... Maybe find some adventure... fall in love... hmm... maybe. I wonder why I don't love Winry anyway... Other then as a sister I mean. It felt kinda like we were meant to be together or something... Hmm... ...Maybe I'm gay?'

In the middle of his oh so important life contemplating, Winry started jogging up alongside Ed, "Hey Ed. And what are you thinking about so deeply, hmm?" She prodded playfully, "You know I'm always here to help out, right?"

Ed started getting a cold sweat down his spine, 'If I don't tell her that I'm not interest in that sort of way, she'll probably kill me later for leading her on...'

"Umm, Winry... There's actually something I should probably tell you..."

"What is it Ed?"

'...Oh man, did she just sound excited? I'm so dead... ...Maybe I shouldn't tell her... No, if I don't do it now, she will _really_ kill me later.'

"Well..."

'Oh dame it all, am I starting to blush, this is so humiliating, why does she have to look at me so hopefully? Stop it Winry, I'm trying to let you down gently!'

"...You see, I was thinking... about love..."

She leaned forward even further. 'No no no, that didn't come out right at all! Ok, I have to tell her now!'

Winry spoke up, "...And?"

"I think I..."

'Say it.'

"...You're..." She tilted her head slightly to the side in a 'cute' way. She looked so darn happy.

He started to get this sick little feeling in his stomach that told him he might just die before the wrenches were whipped out, "Winry... I think I'm... gay..."

The happy look that was in her eyes was almost instantly replaced by a dark look that made Ed start to sweat like crazy. "Oh..."

In a pleading way, Ed squeaked out, "Uh, but please don't tell anyone."

"..." Her frown deepened and she silently walked away.

'...I think I should probably flee for my life while I'm still conscious...' He ran for granny's house down a different path hoping to get there and get out before Winry decided to turn into a psycho killer on him. He was packed and running for the train station in less then fifteen minutes.

_When Ed slammed the door behind him, she assumed that he had fled to Central or something, so she picked up the phone. She had a little phone call to make._

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><p>AN: Let's see if I can't put up a chappy at least once a week on this one.<p>

If anyone would like me to put a pic of Ed up on this for them just ask.

Also, this is not lady bashing in any way, I love the female Fullmetal characters.


	2. Chapter 2

'...I think I'm going to have to kill a certain blond wrench throwing demon... I hope Al will forgive me...' Edward Elric was glaring down at the newspaper held tightly in his hands. On the front page it read,

**The Fullmetal Alchemist is Gay!**

An anonymous source has let it slip that the former Fullmetal Alchemist,  
>hero of the people, prefers people of his same gender…<p>

'I can't read anymore... I better lay low for a while.' He transmuted his jacket into black and covered his head with the hood, blinding in with the crowd due to his slight height deficiency.

As Ed walked down the street, he took many turns seemingly having no set destination. Suddenly he made a sharp turn into the alley, a dark haired figure turning soon after him. His back was facing the stranger he had noticed was following him, his mind racing, '...Shit, it must be one of my enemies, but who? Damn it, who cares!? I'll just kick his ass!'

He did a sharp turn and leaped into the air, his leg spun around ready to launch itself into his victim's throat. Just before it made contact a quick arm came up to block the non-lethal but surely painful kick. A friendly (but to Ed annoying) voice perked up quickly so another blow wouldn't be attempted, "Hey Ed, it is just me. ...You know, it is not safe to wander into alleys alone. People are not always as friendly as you think."

'What the hell!'

"What the fuck do you want Ling!" Ed verbally lashed out.

"Hmm... perhaps something to eat?" Ling noticed the glare being pointed at him, "...I could treat you..."

"You!? You always dump your fucking bill on me and hop away! Fuck no!"

"Yes... well, perhaps this could make up for that, I am royalty after all."

"...I will kill you if you skip out this time..."

"Threat acknowledged," Ling was grinning triumphantly.

"You know I'm going to eat you out of all your money, right?" Ed said smirking.

Ling got a pouty look on his face instantly, "Have a little sympathy, it is not as if my wealth is readily available..." He whined.

After having a large meal at a very cheep restaurant, the two of them walked down central. Ling had kept his word and paid for the meal much to Ed's suspicion. "...So... what's the catch Ling?" He finally asked.

"Hmm... If I am correct, people of your country would consider this a date, yes?" He leaned forward next to the stunned alchemist, whispering into his ear, "Perhaps even go as far as to say you were my boyfriend?"

He blow into Ed's ear causing the mini alchemist to blush scarlet and jump five feet in a different direction, screeching out, "There is no FUCKING way I would date Your sorry ass Ling!"

He tilted his head to the side questioningly, "Why is that? Am I not attractive enough for your taste?"

"It's because you're a fucking cheep ass!" Ed yelled, pointing an accusing finger.

"I believe I am capable of giving you anything you may want. Once I have proven myself worthy of being the next heir to the throne, I will have both money and power. If you would join me on my way back to Xing and become my husband?"

"What the Fuck! What the hell are you trying to pull here Ling!"

"...I believe people in your country would call it ...proposing?"

"NO! I will not go to Xing! I will Not get married to you! And we are NOT Fucking dating!"

Ling reached out, jerking Ed forward for a quick peck on the lips. He jumped away quickly before Ed had time to register what had happened. Edward stood there for almost a whole second before he freaked out, stomping his feet and wiping his mouth off vigorously.

"...WHY THE FUCKING HELL DID YOU FUCKING DO THAT!? I'LL KILL YOU!"

"You are very cute Edward, even when you say hurtful things." Ling replied calmly.

"YOU KNOW WHAT, Fuck You! Keep you Fucking foreign lips away from me!" Ed spun around and stormed off with a murderous aura surrounding him, terrifying the innocent civilians going out for a casual stroll.

"I will wait for you a while longer Edward, please consider me." Ling replied. Ed responded by thrusting up his middle finger as if stabbing the air.

_Lan Fan swooped next to Ling, who was staring longingly down the busy street, "Prince..." She started reluctantly, "I do not believe he would be a wise choice..."_

"_Shh, hush now Lan Fan." She went silent instantly, "I am sorry, but my heart has already been taken by the boy of gold who is now a man."_

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><p>AN: I got done early on this one, yay. But who knows about next week, so no parties yet. :D<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

It was another peaceful day in central. The birds were chirping, the people were going about their average days, and the children played carefreely in the empty alleyways. (Nothing wrong with that at all.) That is, until a shrill voice pierced the air.

"I can't believe that Ling fucking kissed me! Why the Hell! Would I date that lazy ass cheap prince good-for-Nothing! GAH!"

*Kling, kling*

Ed heard a metallic noise over to his right from the street. Looking over he saw the colonel in the back seat, leaning out of the window and rapping against the side of the car to gain his attention. 'Huh? The colonel? Great... my day keeps getting noticeably worse... What the fuck does he want?'

"Get in."

"What the hell do you want colonel!? And I don't have to take fucking orders from you anymore!"

"Language, don't be stubborn Fullmetal..."

"I'm a fucking civilian! Got that! I'm not your fucking dog anymore! I don't have a fucking caller around my fucking neck! AND DON'T FUCKING CALL ME THAT YOU FUCKING BASTARD!"

"Alright, Edward get in the car. I have something important to talk with you about." He replied calmly.

Ed fumed for a minute before getting into the car. As they drove off he said bitterly, "Just to let you know Mustang, you're not going to convince me to renew my contract with the military."

Roy sighed, "Edward, you're not one to just live the rest of your life doing nothing... You simply being here in Central instead of Resembool proves my point."

They both got out of the car and walked up to headquarters together. "How do You know I'm not simply here visiting friends or shopping? Do you have someone following me again Bastard?"

"No Ed, I don't," He responded unaffected, "And I don't really take you for the shopping type," He added with a small smirk.

"...Fuck you..." He flushed slightly from embarrassment.

"Come on Ed, don't tell me you actually Want to do nothing for the rest of your life... At the least this way you could help people who believe in and trust you... Although..." He smirked slightly, "Sending so little help may not be for the best..."

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THEY COULDN'T HELP SOMEONE ACROSS THE STREET BECAUSE THEY'D GET RUN OVER BY A BICYCLE!"

They were both in Mustang's office, Roy seated comfortable behind his desk, "That would be you Fullmetal," He replied while casually sliding some documents towards Ed. Written on said documents was the official reinstatement of the Fullmetal Alchemist into the military.

Hours later, Edward left the building half the man he was when he entered. He was pissed off and on the edge. 'Damn that bastard Mustang! How the hell does the even do that!? Now I have to tell Al. Fuck!'

He walked over to a telephone booth and put some coins into the slot, dialing the number of the Rockbell's. Thankfully for Ed, it was Al's voice who answered the phone, "Hello, Rockbell's Automail..."

"Hey Al."

"Hey Ed, are you ok? Did something happen? Why did you just leave without me!?"

'I'm pretty sure Winry's already told him by now...'

"Ah... I'm fine Al, it's just... I was worried about how you would react... ...and getting a concussion didn't sound so pleasant either. So, I left pretty quickly..."

Al laughed, "Ed, I'm fine with it, really. I'm just worried about you, when are you coming home?"

"...Al... I... can't I... I signed up for the military again..."

"What? But... why?" Al asked, truly puzzled.

"Because I'm a fucking moron who let that bastard Mustang trick me into signing that damn document! He didn't even have to beg or force me, that Bastard!"

"...Wow Ed ...somehow I believe that..."

"Gee, thanks for the support Al."

"Anytime. Well, I guess I have no choice. I'll be there early tomorrow."

"What! But Why!?"

"Because you're no good without me."

"I don't want you wasting your life with the military, Al. You have a chance at a normal life now. I don't want you to give that up."

"Brother, I don't have to join the military to be there for you."

"But Al..."

"No brother, I'm coming to Central and there's nothing you can say to change my mind. I'm going to take the late train and be there first thing in the morning, so you better come to get me at the station."

"Al... Ok Al, you win. I'll see you tomorrow."

The next day, Ed picked Al up from the station. They walked to the military dorms together. Ed unfortunately had to go and report for duty though, so after having a small conversation with his brother, which consisted mostly of Ed pleading Al to not make him go and Al trying to unsuccessfully get him to suck it up, Edward found himself gracefully booted out of his room by a slightly irritated Alphonse.

Edward kicked open the door to Mustangs office, in his usual greeting. "Good morning, Fullmetal," Roy said without looking up from his paperwork. He blindly reached over to grab something, tossing it to the pissed off alchemist, "Here, catch."

Ed looked down at the offending material he gripped tightly in his fists, "Wha... What the Hell! A UNIFORM!"

"Yes, now that you're working in the office you will be required to wear one, standard dress code," Roy replied in an official manner.

'FUCK YOU MUSTANG, AND EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR IN LIFE! Aaaaaaaaaaah! I'm going to fucking kill him!'

Edward growled, barely containing his rage, "Anything else... Sir?" He partially spat out.

"No, get changed and report back. Hawkeye will give you your work, and you can have the extra desk, dismissed."

As Ed went to bitterly do as he was told, a single mantra repeated itself over and over again in his head, 'I HATE HIM, I HATE HIM, I HATE HIM…'

"So..." Havoc bravely stated while observing the ticking time bomb, "Who wants to take bets on this?"

Breda, "I bet that Fullmetal attempts to kill Mustang by the end of the week."

Falman, "I bet that they will both live for at least another month."

Fury, "I bet that Mustang will be able to keep Fullmetal in line."

Riza was busy ignoring the obvious violations against military protocol with this gambling. They never listened, and it was harmless enough anyway.

And Havoc gave that little half smirk of his, "And I bet that Fullmetal will wreak some sort of vengeance within the week. Alright then, so now we wait."

_Edward got a maniacal smirk on his face as his thoughts started turning dark, 'Oh, I will have my revenge... I'll prank him to death! ...Yes, let the torture commence! Muahaha!'_

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><p>AN: No Armstrong in here. Although the thought did make me laugh and be tempted to write a little something.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Well, thanks to a pleading little comment that I was unable to overlook, here I am, apologizing to my few readers. (Stupid addictive games, neh?) So... here's a bit of news I'm sure 90 percent of you don't want to hear. This is not going to be a RoyXEd story. I know, I love it too, but you see it was just a fun little idea I had and the ending is great despite that. So if you will just be patient with this tale. I'm going to immediately start on the next chapter, so that at the least you will have a few chapters out of this fairly quickly. And I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

Can I perhaps do a little something for my disappointed fans? (or just normal readers?) Just one shout out both asking for it and the promise of continuing this till the end, and at the end of this tale (whenever that may be) I will include a short (and hopefully worthy) omake page that will have RoyXEd in it (though not M rated unfortunately).

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><p>"Um... Hey Ed..." Havoc said, while casually leaning against the wall that Fullmetal had hidden himself behind. "What exactly are you doing..." He trailed off, now looking at the pile of what he hoped to be water filled balloons.<p>

"Shh!" Edward hissed, looking back down the hallway he had staked out. He motioned his hand for Havoc to join him in looking around the corner.

Havoc raised an eyebrow but saw no harm in letting Fullmetal cause a little mischief to liven the place up. He leaned around the corner, his head barely sticking out above Fullmetal's and waited for the show to start. He looked at all the faces of the people walking through the hallway.

'I wonder if any of the people here are going to tell a higher up about this...' Havoc thought while watching one of the pretty office ladies sending them a disapproving glance as she walked by, '...Or... maybe they just know better then to get involved...'

*Sploosh*

Havoc quickly spun his head around as three more *sploosh* sounds came quickly after. His cigarette fell to the floor as he heard the hell rouser's tattletale footsteps make a beeline for the exit. He stood there frozen for all of two second, before he burst out laughing.

Mustang stood there soaked, the papers in his hand now ruined and needing to be resigned. His teeth were clenched and it seemed as if he was debating on setting his subordinate on fire. So, with as much effort as he could muster, Havoc took a breath and stated in a normal voice, "It was Fullmetal sir, there was nothing I could do to stop him."

Mustang growled, "Fullmetal..." He stomped his way back towards his office. His boots leaving puddles behind him.

Once he was halfway down the hall, Havoc allowed himself to chuckle, both hoping he wouldn't be incinerated and enjoying the moment almost too much to care. "HAVOC!" Mustang's voice echoed through the hall.

Havoc immediately stood at attention, yelling out, "Yes sir!"

"Clean this mess up!" Roy stated menacingly, his coat disappearing around the corner.

Havoc looked at all the water on the floor, the now smaller pile of balloons leaning against the side of the wall. He sighed, "...Well... at least it was water..."

Mustang looked over his shoulder at the sound of footsteps that were not coming from the direction he was waiting for them to come from. He smirked, when he saw that it was Havoc with his semi-stunned face. He gave a small wave as Havoc, this time, wisely turned right around and walked in the other direction.

Ready to get some revenge on the blond devil, Mustang stood outside the entrance of the military dorms. In his hand he held the end of a string, which ran up the side of the building, went around to the front, and was attached to the side of a bucket which was perched on the edge of the overhang. Inside the bucket was a brown liquid that shined in the light.

Looking around the corner, Mustang smirked as his pray was coming into sight. Just came from the library no doubt about it, in his hands was a somewhat large stack of books. He waited for the right time to strike.

'...That's it Fullmetal, just a bit further.'

Moving the burden into his left hand, Ed reached out to grab the doorknob. *Sploosh* Edward froze his hand resting on the knob and his mind blank. Dripping down his sides and soaking into his clothes was a gooey substance that felt really sticky and gross.

Edward lowered his arm and started to grow furious, "WHAT THE HELL!"

By the time he had responded, Mustang was already long gone. Alphonse rushed outside at having heard his brother screaming. "Ed! What's wrong!" He looked at Edward and started giggling, "Um... Ed?"

"Not! Another word," Ed grit out.

"Ah, ok Ed," Al smiled. As he walked closer he could smell that whatever it was smelled sweet. He stuck out his finger and ran it over the liquid, bringing it to his mouth and tasting it. "Hmm, maple syrup."

"MUSTANG!"

Riza walked into the office and immediately knew that today was not going to be one of those good days. She had assumed that something like this might be happening upon hearing the childish yells while walking towards the office. But out of all the scenarios in her head, this was not one she was expecting to walk into.

All of the 'children' in the office besides Falman who had taken to hiding behind one of the far off desks were participating in what looked like a 'paper clip war'. They had even got Fury to join, shooting a stray paper clip occasionally into the air. She walked into the room, then dropped the heavy stack of papers in her hands on the desk, making a loud *Thud* sound cut through the sound.

The room stilled. Riza turned to Ed first, "Edward, don't you have some research you need to be doing?" Ed fled the room without another prompt. She then looked at the other men in the office who upon seeing her turn to them all stood at attention, "Sit down."

"Yes mam!" They sat down and immediately went back to work ignoring the paper clips scattered around them.

Then Riza looked at Mustang, who looked slightly worried. She said to him in a slightly chilled tone while picking up the paperwork, "Your paperwork sir..."

Roy responded quickly, "Of course Lieutenant Hawkeye..." He walked into his office, followed closely by Riza.

She placed the paperwork on his desk, as observed as Roy enthusiastically started signing some of them. She spoke up, "Excuse me for my insubordination sir, but this has gone on long enough." Roy stopped writing as a chill went down his spine, "If you don't stop this, I will." And with that finality, Riza left the room so Roy could have some 'peace and quiet' to do his work.

Edward was walking grouchily down the hallway questioning this turn of events in his life when all of a sudden he was quickly pulled around a corner, "What the hell!"

"No need to yell Ed, it's just me."

"What the fuck do you want Mustang! Just to let you know I'm not going to stop until my contract is terminated! So don't even bother..." Roy grabbed Edward by his collar and pulled him in for a quick peck on the lips to silence him. Then immediately let him go, "Wha... What the Hell! Did you do that for!?"

"...I'm not really sure Fullmetal, but I believe that it's time for these childish games to stop... You're not a child anymore, Ed..." Roy stared deeply into Edward's eyes causing a light blush to cross his face.

"..." Edward stood there speechless, unable to respond.

Roy opened his mouth, "...Would you consider going on a date with me?"

Edward's mouth gaped open, his face turning crimson, and his thoughts racing, 'The Fuck! Why dose he have to fucking ask me something like that! Doesn't he, I don't know, fucking hate me!? What the hell!'

"...Edward?" Roy asked questioningly upon not receiving a response.

"...You... you like women!" Ed blurted out in his usual graceful manor, his face still a bright red.

Roy countered skillfully, "Yes I do, but I also don't mind men. You see, I'm actually bisexual, it's just that the women talk about it while the men keep it to themselves, for appearances sake."

"...I thought you hated me!" He pointed an accusing finger at Roy.

Roy gave on of his super sexy smirks, "I don't hate you Edward. You're simply a loud, obnoxious, and stubborn young man. But..." He tilted his head slightly, "I find that I like these qualities in you... when they're not directed at me anyway."

He stepped forward, and took Edward's hands into his own, "There's also the fact that you're intelligent, strong, brave, determined, creative, and that you take care of those you hold dear. And I know that I would love to become one of those people, if you would let me. Please, take as long as you need to decide." He then kissed the back of Ed's left hand, then walked away as if nothing happened.

Edward was left blushing furiously and chastising himself, 'Why the hell, did you let him get away with that without even kicking him in the nuts! He wouldn't even be able to do a damn thing about it since he was the one who started it! Ugg! Don't tell me I'm actually considering this! FUCK, Fuck, FUCK! Al can help me with this right? ...No, no he doen't need to know about this sort of thing... right? You know what! Maybe I should just give it a try! I'll eat Mustang out of a house, and it's not like he'll actually 'date' me for that long anyway... right?'

The next day, Edward entered Roy's office like a normal human being for the first time in a long time. This caused every head in the office to stare at the closed door before them. The men immediately moved over to press their ears to the door, Riza simply had a small smile on her face as she kept working.

Edward stood before the desk. "Mustang," He stated, his hands resting on his hips.

"Yes, Edward?" Roy replied setting his pen down to give his full attention.

'Fuck. Dose he have to fucking call me that now...' Edward blushed slightly.

"...I'll go on a date with you, if you pay..."

Roy folded his hands, resting his chin lightly on them, "I'll pick you up at seven Friday night, wear something nice."

"...um... ok..." Ed stared at him with a slightly odd look on his face, shifting his feet a bit.

Roy started to smirk, "You can leave now, unless you just want to stare at me all day that is."

"Fuck you Mustang!" Ed spun around and stormed off towards the door.

"You can call me Roy..." Roy added lightly.

Edward stopped in front of the door briefly, his face turning a bit red, "..." He opened the door, slamming it on his way out. Roy's smirk grew a bit larger as he simply returned to his paperwork.

Edward didn't even notice the men huddled together whispering to each other as he left the room in a rush.

"Um... Ed?" Al questioned while Ed was adjusting his suit. "What are you getting dressed up for?"

"Ah..." Ed looked for a way to tell his baby brother that he was about to go on a date with the man he despised for so long. Thankfully he was saved the explanation when the doorbell rang, "I'll get it, Al."

Alphonse followed, curious about what his brother was up to. His jaw dropped when he saw that it was Mustang at the door, also dressed up in a suit. His brother spoke up, "Ah, I'll be home soon Al, don't wait up," then left before he could say anything.

Ed was walking with Roy back towards his place. He had been surprised that Roy took him to someplace that was actually decent and not completely cheep. And though he ate more then what would have been considered average, it wasn't nearly as much as he could have eaten.

He had actually enjoyed his time talking with Roy like a normal person for once, and not have to think about him being his superior officer. When they had left the restaurant, Roy asked Ed if he wanted to have some cake he made over at his place for dessert. And who was Ed to turn down even more free food.

Roy once again opened the door for him, which somewhat pissed Ed off, but not enough to yell at him to fucking stop it. It was just a door right, that didn't mean that Mustang was putting him in the female position... right? Ed grit his teeth slightly as he took the offered seat in the living room, waiting for Roy to bring out a slice of cake.

Besides that and Mustang wiping off one of the crumbs on his face with his thumb, the whole night was pretty sweet. Ed had a full stomach, a full wallet, and nothing really weird happened, which was a really nice change from the usual. Roy walked Ed out the door when he was ready to go, but just before Ed left the doorway, he spun him around for a kiss.

Edward thought about giving him a quick punch to the chin, but then decided that this was a date and that he was gay. So, he just closed his eyes and let him. With this silent permission Roy ran his tongue lightly over Edward's bottom lip, asking for entrance.

Edward opened his mouth slightly, and Roy entered unhesitant. He wrapped his arms around Ed and swept him away in a passionate kiss that stole his breath away. Ed moaned slightly, which was exactly what snapped him out of his trance to finally realizing what the heck he was doing.

Panicked, Ed kicked Roy mercilessly in the shin with his nonmetal foot. As Roy sucked in a deep pained breath, Edward turned around swiftly and fled. 'What the fuck! What the Fuck! What the FUCK!' Was running through his head as he ran towards the dorms.

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><p>AN: Man I really love RoyXEd, why wouldn't you just let it happen Ed? Because in the end, that is not the ultimate destiny of this fic. I thank you for reading this till the end, and before we part ways once more, a final question. Who is going to be the next attemptee?<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

AN: Now is the time for a warning insert, two to be exact. The first warning is that the second warning contains spoilers for the following chapter. If you are not afraid of that then by all means continue to read this. The second and main warning is that this chapter contains incest in the form of Al having quite the serious crush on Ed. End of warning, and with that please enjoy the chapter.

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><p><em>Havoc, "So, Mustang and the boss, huh? I knew Fullmetal was gay and all, but I certainly wasn't expecting it from 'the legendary womanizer of central'. Not that I'm sad or anything." He grew a huge smile on his face.<em>

_Breda, "Yah, I though those rumors were baloney, but... I guess they were true?"_

_Falman, "I for one am extremely disappointed in Colonel Mustang for exercising these highly frowned upon breeches in military conduct."_

_Fury, "I think we should leave them be guys. If that's what they want, then let them. I think they would be nice together."_

_Riza walked over to the gossiping group to add her own opinion, "I don't know Fury. I doubt this will work out so smoothly..."_

_Fury, "What make you say that Lieutenant?"_

_Havoc, "Yah, they seem to have a sort of yen yang thing going on, right? Fullmetal the hot head, and Flame the cool and level headed..."_

_Riza, "Yes, well..." She folded her arms, "Let's just call it woman's intuition..."_

Edward opened the door to the dorm room, tiptoeing so he wouldn't disturb Al's sleep. "Your home pretty late..." Edward jerked to a halt, letting out a low curse word at the sound of Al's voice.

'He must have stayed up all this time waiting for me to come home, poor Al. And I kept him waiting this whole time just because I had to go and have some stupid delicious cake at the bastard's house.'

"Um... Hey Al... Why are you still awake?"

"I've been waiting for you brother. Did you and Roy do anything? Something that I wouldn't approve of?" He implied heavily.

"No, no, no! Al, I swear nothing happened! It just got late... and some cake... and..."

Alphonse eyes started to water, "Ed... don't you care about me?"

Ed's eyes grew wide, "YES! Al, why would you even think that?!"

"You didn't even tell me that you liked Mr. Mustang."

"Al. I swear that I'm not planning on seeing him outside of work, so you don't need to worry about it, alright?" He gave a small reassuring smile.

Al blinked away the barely forming tears, "...Ok, so you don't have any other secrets you're hiding from me, right?"

Edward opened his arms up to let his brother give him a hug, "No Al, I don't"

"Good," Al leaned back a bit and sent a puppy dog look up at Ed, "Could I sleep with you tonight?"

'Aw, guess I really worried him tonight...'

"...Sure Al," Edward replied, a soft smile on his face. They slept together for hours before it was time for Ed to return to work. The sun shined in Ed's eyes telling him that it was time to start his day.

Ed woke up to his brother sleeping soundly in his arms. He smiled and gave him a small hug, 'Just like a kid... Fucking work...'

After that night, Al returned to sleeping in his own bed. During work Ed and Roy spent as much time as they possibly could ignoring each other. This caused the other men in the office to learn a valuable but weary lesson, that womanly senses were something not to be taken lightly.

A few days later, "Breakfast!" Al yelled up to Ed. Ed came down the stares and started eating the food in his usual way, one mouthful at a time. Alphonse sat down with him and ate more like a normal human. "So, are you going to be dating again anytime soon?"

"No, I'm just going to relax for a while before I even think trying anything. I don't want to freak out again before I'm ready."

"...Would you want to get some ice cream with me at the park?"

"Sure Al after work, I might need it after how this week has been going..."

The Elric's walked next to each other through the park enjoying their ice cream. Al accidentally got some of his ice cream smeared on the side of his mouth causing Ed to laugh. They stopped at the wishing fountain together to throw in a coin, and then finally Al had convinced Ed to push him on the swings. Even though Ed whined that this sort of activity was meant for kids.

'It's so nice of Al to help me forget about my problems. He's such a great brother,' Ed thought to himself as he and Al walked home.

Two weeks later, Alphonse was staring blankly across the table at the somewhat tall blond man seated next to Ed at their table eating a sandwich. "Hey big brother, who's this?" Al asked.

"Oh hey Al, this is Russell." He gestured his hand a bit towards their houseguest who gave a nod of acknowledgement. "He seemed like an interesting guy and asked me out and stuff. So, I decided to invite him over for some lunch or whatever."

Alphonse blinked a few times in disbelief before sitting down at the table, "Ed... You have not tact whatsoever..."

Ed huffed up at that, "I do to have some Al. I'm just..." He got a slight blush of embarrassment on his face, "Um..." He moved his hand a bit in an unclear gesture of some kind, "New to this... uh... love... ...thing."

Russell gave a snort to that, looking away at Ed's glare at him. Alphonse pressed on, "Um... Ok? So, how did you two meet... exactly?"

"Oh that, meet him in the park. Gave me a bit of a sappy line about me looking nice and shit and we started talking about how dumb people can be sometimes." Russell rolled his eyes and Al silently agreed with him on this one, Ed was defiantly one of the least romantic people on the planet.

Russell stayed till after dinner. Al had to admit, he was a very bright young man, a bit of a dark sense of humor at times but bright. Alphonse told Russell some embarrassing stories about Ed causing him to blush a lot, which was so cute.

But then Russell had the nerve to lean over and peck his precious brother on the cheek and whisper how adorable he looked when he blushed. Thank goodness Edward took a swipe at him after that, or Al might have given Russell a rude comment. He told Al how good his cooking was before he finally left, with a flip of the hair, a small smirk, and a wave of the hand.

"Until next time Ed," He said.

"Yah, later Russ," Ed replied.

Alphonse quickly went to do the dishes so he could silently vent his anger, 'Such an uppity, self absorbed man! I seriously hope that Ed doesn't continue this relationship, or I'm going to have to get involved in this one personally," He mentally threatened.

He didn't notice Ed observing him, "Hey Al... you haven't really said anything yet..."

"...Whatever makes you happy brother..." He finished washing the dishes and dried his hands, "...but..."

When he didn't continue, Ed prompted him, "...But?"

"...Brother?" He said quietly, questioningly, "Would you hate me if I said something...?"

"No Al. I could never hate you. You can tell me anything." He said with the same finality that he always used whenever he would talk to Al. Something Al loved so much about him.

"Ed I... I think that... to me he doesn't seem right for you..."

"Why not Al?" Ed questioned curiously, "What's wrong with him?"

"...It's because..." He trailed off, "...because I..." His face grew slightly flushed as he mumbled the next part, "...I like you..."

"Al, your not making any since, just spit it out," Ed prodded.

Al whispered, "...I love you, Ed."

Edward smiled, "I love you too Al, but..."

He was cut off by Al now half shouting, "No! Ed I..." His voice went back to below normal, "I want something... more... I... I want you to love me. As more then just a brother," His face was now crimson as he continued no chance of turning back now, "But... I don't want you to hate me... please..."

Al's eyes started to water, as he lost all the strength in his legs and lowered himself down to kneel on the ground. He had said one of his greatest secrets, something that he had only found out himself upon learning that he could possibly stand a chance of being with his brother forever, as something more. His tears ran down his face as he waited and prayed for his brother to at the least not hate him.

Edward stood in shock at the admission. He watched as his poor little brother sunk down to the ground in tears, unable to do a thing about it. He gathered himself together and walked slowly over to Al, getting down on a knee to gently hug his brother in a comforting manor.

"Al... I..." He swallowed, "I'm sorry but... I can't... Please Al... please don't cry, but... I think I should leave... Al... I'll always love you, just... just as a brother..." Al's cries grew louder at that comment, "...I'm sorry... Al." Ed finished with a whisper.

Edward stood up slowly. He went upstairs to get his little suitcase packed. Taken less then five minute he silently left the dorms to go out and find a hotel to sleep at.

_Alphonse heard the door close gently, even though he was still crying. He took a deep shaky breath. He curled up on the ground thinking to himself that he would probably stay in that spot for a while..._

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><p>AN: Poor Al. *teardrop* So, the main people lusting after Ed would be considered some of the bigger pairings in the yaoi world such as the LingXEd, RoyXEd, and now the EdXAl. I'm sure some of the fans of FMA yaoi reading may be able to guess one surefire pairing to come in the story, but perhaps it would be best to keep it in your own heads to leave it as a surprise for the other readers?<p>

In other news, I have some lovely omake ideas ready for the fic that I hope will be a nice extras section for the story. One of them happens to be just for the certain fans that happened to mention a certain Armstrong... three times already. Just letting you know... This is all your fault. :P


	6. Chapter 6

AN: Mmh... I'm actually thinking this is the last 'normal?' pairing... Huh, hope I didn't hint at anything more... oops? A few more crackish pairings and the extras to follow, so there's more to look forward too, but my question is, did you guess right?

Also, to people who read these author's notes. Hey, if you liked this story maybe you'd like to influence future stories? Just put up a poll on my homepage about ideas I have for when I get done with this work. If your interested drop a few votes I guess.

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><p>Russell was walking Ed to his hotel room. They had just got done taking a very long walk, with Ed brooding and Russell just humming a little tune quietly next to him. Russell had thoroughly insisted that Edward needed the fresh air after holing himself up in his room for two days, whining that Al would hate him forever.<p>

Just before Ed went inside, Russell stopped him at the door for a little kiss on the lips, but Edward stopped him, "No way Russell. Now is defiantly not the time for me to put up with shit like this."

"Edward," Russell tutted a little, "You know that people who are dating kiss, right Edward? ~" He sang sung a little bit at the end.

"Seriously Russell? No. I don't want to deal with this right now." Ed insisted.

"But Ed ~ You need someone to comfort you right now ~"

"Not now Russell," Edward sighed, "Not now..." He closed the door, shutting out the pouting Russell.

Every other day or so, Russell would repeat this pattern. Take Ed out for some fresh air, comfort him a bit, then when they got back to the hotel attempt to kiss him, get rejected, shrug it off, and come back next time hoping Ed would warm up to it. He ran out of patients after two weeks.

"Ed, Ed, Ed. I don't see why you keep trying to stall. It's been over two weeks now. I've been trying to be patient, and it's obvious that you like me a lot..." Russell said in a slightly cooing way.

"Russell... I'm just trying not to move to fast. After the thing with Al... and Mustang... Heck I'm not even sure if I can handle a relationship. If you're going to date me, then you're just going to have to go at my pace." He stated with finality.

Russell put his hands in his pockets, frowning at Edward. He sighed, "...Sure Edward, I understand."

"Good." Edward unlocked his hotel room and opened the door. He turned around to wish Russell a goodnight.

Russell pushed Edward inside, slamming him into the hallway wall while kicking the door shut behind him. Edward tried to push him off, only to find that he wasn't able to budge him from his spot. To his horror he heard a ripping sound.

Russell had ripped his shirt open, biting the side of his neck so harshly a bit of blood was leaking from the wound. He then picked the stunned Edward up by his neck and threw him onto the bed. He slowly stalked over to Ed, who could feel the fight instincts screaming inside of him. He glared at Russell with a burning hatred, and a little bit of hurt.

"Wazamatter Pipsqueak?" A very not Russell voice came out from his lips, "Doncha like me anymore?"

"ENVY!" Edward roared.

'Oh fuck!' Was all that ran through his head on the subject.

Envy transformed back into his normal look, wearing a mocking smile, "Very good Edo. Now, can you tell me what I'm going to do next?"

He snickered for a second before pouncing on Edward. He pinned him down, straddling Ed at the hip. Edward pushed his body up harshly to attempt to throw Envy off, even though Envy was way too heavy for him to move.

Accidentally rubbing up against him in the process, "Oh my Edo ~ You're being so feisty tonight ~" He mocked.

Edward screamed at him as loudly as he could, causing Envy to jump off the back of the bed covering his ringing ears. Edward quickly transmuted the metal headboard into a blade. He rushed at Envy who quickly leaped out of the window with Ed following close behind.

"Wow Edo, quite the set of lung on you, huh?" Envy chortled, dodging a spear thrown at him as he hopped from rooftop to rooftop, "Going to have to do something about that huh pipsqueak?" He smirked as he turned around to face Ed, dodging a slice towards his throat by leaning backwards, "Woh ho ~ Not trying to kill me, are you pipsqueak?"

"STOP!" Ed made another wild swing, which Envy dodged to the right. "FUCKING!" He swung again, which Envy dodged with a duck, "CALLING ME A PIPSQEAK!" He made a charge forward that Envy hopped over to the side to dodge.

Envy stuck around, trying to get Edward to wear himself out so that he could play with him. Instead, he ended up loosing some of the few lives he had, which caused him to cuss. He then fought back with a few kicks he dared to throw not wanting to damage his super sexy little toy too much.

On his final life, Envy finally decided to label this attempt a total failure and get out of there before he was gone for good. He hopped off a good distant and smirked at Edward, "Well, it's been fun Pipsqueak, but I really should be going now. Getting a bit late an all," He waved his hand in an emphasis to the moon that was now starting to set for the new day.

He turned and jumped over to the next rooftop running off towards the center of central. His feet made a pitter patter sound along the tiles as he made his escape, 'Man... I really wanted to get some. Damn that Pip...'

"Gah!" His thoughts were rudely cut off by a sudden unexpected pain that buried itself into his chest. Blood gushed out of his mouth as he staggered, before falling to the rooftop, now dieing from the spear that was launched into his back.

He looked back at the figure that was walking towards him in the moonlight. His golden hair shining in the glow, he looked like an avenging angel coming for him. "...Edo?" He breathed, before he chocked on more blood, falling onto the spear, his body starting to dissolve into dust from his feet up.

_Ed looked down now in slight grief. He hadn't meant to kill the bastard. He had just wanted to beat the living hell out of him before he let him go, to force him to swear never to return... 'Damn it all... Every fucking time...'_

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><p>AN: Omg, not Tringham, no way. Well, I'm the writer so I saw it coming, but... Lol. Anyways, no no Tringham, see I was wrapping this story mostly around the manga, so the Tringham's may exits but they could also easily not exist. I just wanted this chappy to be a bit of a surprise for my readers. ...Suprise? So, who will guess the next crack pairing?<p>

Ps. I really like the next chapter. :D

Spoiler warning: After giving it the tiniest bit of thought, a brief discussion of Envy being alive at this mock end of the manga type story. I've got two options for you. One, Envy didn't commit suicide and escaped so he could participate in this story, or two, the author (me) needed him for this tale so it doesn't matter anyways. Take your pick I guess, Lol. (If you want to keep your sanity, take my advice and pick the second one now. Lol)


	7. Chapter 7

AN: To the girl who guess this one right, congratulations! You have won a hypothetical duplication potion as per request. (Which translates to basically nothing, but oh well, it's the thought that counts right?)

Trying to keep it manga friendly, I deterred from the original twist that this chapter. For the sake of my own sanity and funny bone, I included a short original omake to the end of this chapter showing how it was supposed to end. Let me know which you approve of/liked better, ok? Also, who's going to be next to attemptee to swoon Edward?

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><p>*Clap, clap, clap, clap...*<p>

Ed turned around at the sound of someone clapping their hands. One rooftop over crouched down on the ledge was Greed, somehow back in his old body. He stood up and said, "Nicely done kid."

"What the fuck do you want Greed?" Ed spit out.

"Woh there kid, easy," Greed said with a pacifying motion of the hands, "I just stopped by to ask if you'd like to go on a date with me? This saves me the trouble of asking you to leave your boyfriend," He smirked.

"..." Edward was extremely confused about the situation at hand, "...At night?" He questioned skeptically.

"Well, I do live in the shadows kid," Greed responded nonchalantly, "So, will it be a yes or no?" He finished with a single raise of the brow.

Edward wasn't sure if he should label this as another fucked up sign from God that he was eternally damned, or if this was a sign that he was finally going crazy. Torn between flat out laughing, and a murderous rage waiting to be unleashed, Ed response turned out equally nonchalant, "...Well... I guess I've already dated one homunculus..." He took a breath, "Why not?"

"Great," Greed let out in a pleasant tone, his head tilting back a bit, "Follow me kid."

The two of them hopped into the alleyway together. Ed following his new... whatever. He wasn't entirely sure if he could handle even thinking about anything right now.

'Greed is almost casual to a fault, right... Maybe if I just pretend like nothings happened, I won't go crazy... At least for now... Yah, that sounds like a plan my mind can deal with. I mean, it's not like anything crazier then this is going to happen... right?'

After some traveling, the two of them were walking down the street towards the old Devil's Nest location. Ed looked at him with what could only be described as a 'seriously?' face. Greed put on a little smile and replied to the unspoken question, "Well, it brings back an old sense of nostalgia. The military's not even aware of my existence right now, let along my secret hideout."

Ed let out a sigh and shrugged his shoulders, following Greed inside. He turned down the offered alcohol, no matter how depressed he was at the moment he wouldn't walk down that path. He asked for some apple juice and hoped that the company would be decent enough not to hide himself away in his room once again. He had his doubts, outside of Mustang finding him and sending some sort of a squad to drag him back to work, that anyone would come for him.

Little did Ed know that there was a tiny bit of alcohol in the apple juice, after about three Ed and Greed where having a great time making fun of Mr. Eats-a-lot, the Romancer of Central, and the palm tree haired Rapist. Around one o'clock Ed realized just how late he had stayed and with the tiniest bit of swaying stood up.

Greed made a come here gesture with his finger, a big smirk on his face. Ed looked at him with distrust, so Greed cupped his hand to the side of his mouth as if to whisper something to him. Ed wasn't entirely capable of holding onto his distrust that night, so he leaned forward to hear what Greed wanted to tell him semi-privately.

Once he was in close enough, Greed leaned forward, his hand hiding his actions, and left a little peck on Edward's cheek. Ed blush went over his whole face at the action. He left quickly, going to Izumi's house to sleep there. Thankfully she was blissfully unaware of Ed's spontaneous reinstatement into the military and welcomed him into her house in her usual violent way.

The next day, Edward went back eventually, and Greed acted like nothing had happened the day before. They went for a walk through the pipe works building to get away from all the other people, Izumi and Sig, Greed's chimeras. Edward smiled as his memories of hiding from Izumi with Al rushed back to him.

When the day was over, Greed didn't even bother to walk Ed home. He just waved Ed off when he mention that it was getting close to dinnertime, and that Izumi would hunt him down for missing dinner. Overall it had been a pretty nice day.

That was how it went for about a week. Greed giving a surprise peck on the cheek every once and a while, but overall he let Ed do whatever he felt like doing. He didn't try to work his way onto Ed's good side, wasn't trying to force Ed's hand, and Edward really appreciated it.

Ed went out running and errand for Izumi one day, Greed had understood and just went off to do whatever he did during the daytime. Edward thought to himself how surprisingly sweet Greed could be, it was pretty weird. On his way down the road he briefly looked over in the familiar direction of the bar to see Greed, Martel, and some other girl who looked a bit slutty approach the door.

'Huh... that's weird. Did Loa and Dolcetto go inside already then?'

A flare of jealousy went up inside of him when Greed wrapped an arm around the slutty girl, who actually had the nerve to snuggle up into his embrace. When the door shut Edward marched over to a couple of guys that was standing watch at the door. They looked over to him and the cockier one spoke up.

"Greed's doing some business right now. You'll have to come back when he's done."

Edward clapped his hands together and pressed one up against the wall. A giant hand slammed the two of them into the opposite wall knocking them out. He moved for the door, kicking it in.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" What the first thing that was screeched out of Edward's lips. Greed was seated comfortably on the couch with his hand gently cupping Martel's cheek. One each side of him was four girls each looking to gain his attention. Greed looked over, a little upset looking but overall neutral.

"Greed..." Edward growled, "Who are they?" He pointed at the women surrounding him.

"What can I say Ed," He shrugged his shoulders, "I'm Greedy as hell." He smirked his wicked smirk.

Edward walked out of the Devil's Nest a bit worse for the wear. There where some cuts and a few bruises from his fight with Greed and his minions, but overall he was pretty well off. The sluts had run off at the first signs of violence, and Greed and his minions where incapacitated and ready to be haled off to prison.

Edward went up to the phone booth around the corner and called Mustang. The phone rang a few times before his board voice responded, "...Mustang."

'Must be working a bit late today, Hawkeye can sure be a slave driver when she wants to be...'

"Hey Roy..."

"Ed?" His voice sounded slightly concerned now, "Is something wrong? It's pretty late out."

"Yah... I ran into a homunculus..."

"Edward," He stated seriously, "Are you ok?"

"Yah, I'm fine Mustang." He shuffled his feet a bit nervously, "They're tied up, in cages, unconscious. I just need you to get over here and clean up."

"I'll be right over, where are you at?"

"The old Devil's Nest, it was Greed."

"Ok Ed, stay there. I want a report in person when I get there."

"...Fine." He hung up the phone and sat down on the curve.

'It shouldn't take them too long. I don't want to go back to Izumi's place looking like this anyway. ...She's going to kill me for not showing up for dinner...'

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><p>AN: Now for the few who noticed my Pokeadventure story don't worry, the competition for 'what I'm going to write up next' is still in effect. I've just been too antsy about putting this one out, so I just did it. The winner of the poll will get at least one chapter put up after Got to Love Ed, with an Author's Note about its future inside.<p>

I thank you for your patience. Also, for those who care... I put some of my own artwork up. ~ I'm an ok artist, not good, but ok. I'm most proud of my Slendy drawing. ~

Warning Spoilers. Now as for greed, I'm sure 'because the author wanted too' would fit the bill better, but if you really wanted to push it, it could have been something along the lines of Greed didn't need to give up his life for some reason and then found a way back into his old body. After all he was created the first time, so why not a second time right? So, there you go on that one I guess.

More Spoilers. Also, with Dolcetto, Loa, and Martel, can you blame me, Greed and those three belong together. So, they got away from the military, if you really want to go for the plausible 'alter the story a bit' approach.

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><p>Omake Insert<br>(Just because I think I should.)

~The Original End to this Chapter ~

Edward kicked down the door, "WHAT THE FUCK!"

Greed was sitting on the couch with his hand cupped around Martel's face, surrounded by about twenty other girls.

"Greed…" Edward growled out, "Who are they?"

"…Eh…What can I say…I'm Greedy."

Edward walked out of the Devil's Nest, walking straight for the phone booth around the corner.

It rang for a bit before a familiar board voice responded, "…Mustang"

"Hey Roy"

The voice suddenly took a worried tone, "Ed? Is something wrong? It's the middle of the night!"

"…Oh..." He twirled the cord around his finger and looked over his shoulder, "...just a murder scene..." Down the path he had come from a trail of bloody boot prints lead up to the phone booth, "I killed a homunculus and a few of his accomplices. (The women, lol.) I was just telling you so you could cover it up. It's at the old Devil's Nest."

"I'll take care of it then... Are you sure you're ok?"

"Yah I'm fine, just a few scratches."

"Edward, don't move. I mean it, we'll be right over."

"...Fine." He hung up the phone and sat down on the curve.

'It's not like I have anything better to do... right?'

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><p>AN: I love that version so much. ~ I wish I could have used it, but gez I'm trying my absolute best to make it manga friendly, at least till the 'official ending' anyway. One omake to come is going to be totally cracky.<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

AN: Oh gosh, I just skimmed through the ending of Fullmetal to see if I was doing this accurately enough... And I loove Fullmetal Alchemist. *Insert hearts* (From Vol. 21 till 27.) Also, in the first chapter, it said 'Now that Al's back in his old body...' so this is an after the manga fic.

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><p>'<em>...I thought I told him to wait here!'<em>

_Mustang rubbed his forehead trying to ward away the headache that was making itself known. He growled a bit, 'Ok, Fullmetal's disappeared, again. Doing who knows what. The Devil's Nest was found to have been completely emptied. The cages ripped open, ruined rope shards lying over the ground, and the occasional blood stain...'_

_He moaned, 'Figures Fullmetal would get me to come all the way out here just to give me even more work. Damn him.'_

_He turned to face his men, "Has the building been all cleared?"_

_Riza spoke up, "Yes sir, there's not a trace of anything other then a fight, capture, and an apparent escape. Edward's location is unknown as well."_

_Roy sighed, "Yes that's what it seems like." He turned to face the once again destroyed bar, "I really don't see why the military left this place standing..." He raised his arm up._

_*Click*_

_The building busted into flames just as the sun started rising. 'You better be ok Fullmetal... You're not worth the extra paperwork.'_

'Ow... my head.' Edward was coming to, the light being mercifully dim as he cracked his eyes open. 'Huh... this takes me back to Lior...' His hands were tied up above him, the dungeon walls surrounding him, his shirt off... 'Huh... when did I loose my shirt...'

"Fullmetal Alchemist, it would seem you're awake."

'...Oh Shit.'

Though he was slightly panicking on the inside, he made himself grit his teeth and respond without showing fear, "What the hell do you want Scar!?" He spat out.

Scar looked down upon him through his shades not responding. Edward took the opportunity to keep talking while he tried to think of a way out of this, "If I'm not dead yet then you must want something!"

He remained silent which caused Edward even more distress. They had been neutral ever since trying to save Amestris together. The last he had heard about him was that he had revived the Ishvalan culture together with Miles. There had to be something more to this, "...Well?!"

Scar opened his mouth, "...Eyes of golden sun,  
>Hair like fields of wheat,<br>Glowing with fiery passion,  
>It was destined that we meet."<p>

Edward's jaw had dropped, '...What?'

"I was blood thirsty,  
>Killing state alchemists my goal,<br>Yet one look into your pure eyes,  
>And my heart is what you stole."<p>

Edward went pale, '...What... I... I think I'm in hell... God would put me here... Damn God...'

"...I love you Fullmetal Alchemist, Edward Elric."

It was Edward's turn to be speechless for some time, before finally he spoke up, "...Um..." Such a graceful start, "...Could you... let me go...?"

Scar stood there for a while, before he moved forward, kneeling down next to Edward. Ed closed his eyes as his hand moved towards him. His eyes opened in a second when he felt the chains being removed. He stood up quickly, rubbing his wrists a bit.

Scar stood up and moved to the door. "Return to me Fullmetal, and you will be mine," Scar said, opening the door.

Edward stood there for a second before he let out a reluctant, "...Thanks..." He then walked out the door, and out of the abandoned building. He was in a less friendly part of Central, he noted as he walked for a bit.

'...Why the hell am I here...?'

He started making a mad rush for Central's military headquarters. He occasionally took a glance behind him to make sure no former serial killers where following him. Central's headquarters was making itself known, the sun was shining overhead, and there was no sign of any pursuers.

'...He let me get away?'

_Scar watched his golden sun disappear over the horizon, 'I release you in the hopes that you will come back to me. And I accept if you never do... Until next time, Fullmetal...'_

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><p>AN: So, two questions to end the chapter with: One, did you like the chapter? Two, did you like the poem? Until next time.<p> 


	9. Ending 1

AN: Oh my, I'm so flatter by the reviewers who liked the poem. You guys are awesome. And yes, Al does get over it. He and Ed get on good terms again. Also, Ed gets kidnapped by Izumi again, beaten up a little bit, and finally apologizes for missing dinner, in case anyone was worried about that too.

Even though it's not going to show up in the story, let's pretend that Al is bisexual at heart. And when he goes back home to Risembool with a broken heart, Winry takes him gently under her wing. The two of them eventually do get together just like Ed thought they would.

Spoiler Warning. At the end of the manga, they call it the presidency. They even say President Bradley. I think I'll just keep calling it Fuhrer though, because well that's what we all think about it, yah? I'm pretty sure Mustang was promoted above Colonel a long time ago too, so not like I haven't already bended that barrier anyway.

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><p><em>At Central's military headquarters, a press conference was being held to question the investigative team lead by Mustang on the events leading up to the house fire located in the lower class area of Dublith. Colonel Mustang stood before the members of the press giving his evaluation of the situation at hand, "...guarantee you that the fire was not in fact caused by a careless member of the investigative team, but by a stray Amestrian who had an extreme dislike of the Amestris military. The individual escaped capture and we continue our efforts to apprehend and question the youth responsible. Now are there any questions?"<em>

"_Colonel Mustang! What did the individual look like?" Was a notable question raised from the small crowd._

"_We were merely able to identify that it was a young most likely male figure. The odds of finding the individual are slim, and we only hold the faintest of hope of tracking down the individual. However in the hopes that these events will not be repeated, a few troops have been assigned to patrol the area until further notice..."_

"_Colonel Mustang! Is there a possibility it was an enemy attack from a neighboring country!" _

"_How many people died in the fire!" _

"_Any suspicions that there was an alternative purpose for the attack! Colonel Mustang!"_

_The questions kept poring in as Mustang stood his ground at the podium that was at the front of the Military headquarters. He noticed Fullmetal running up the stairs to get into the building. He said into the microphone over the crowd's voices, "Fullmetal, in my office."_

_Edward looked over at him. He looked extremely confused but ran over to Mustang, whispering to him quickly, "Sure, but I have to say something first." He lightly pushed Roy. Clapping his hands together and making some of the ground raise him up, so he was able to talk into the microphone before the press._

The next day's newspaper was a big hit. Any news involving Amestris's known 'Hero of the People' being on the front page was sure to be a big seller. Overshadowing even the supposed theories of a potential new attack on Amestris's own soil was a quick article at the very top. It read:

**The Fullmetal Alchemist Declares Newfound Asexuality?**

Less then a year later after a claim of the Fullmetal's supposed gay alignment comes a stunning report from Fullmetal himself during a follow up press conference involving the fire attack. The Fullmetal Alchemist came forward and made a quick and simple statement, "Hey, I'm asexual alright, so everyone just (expletive) off." And that was the conclusion of his claim before he quickly retired to his headquarters upon his superior's request...

The night before in Colonel Mustang's office, after a long and tiring conclusion to his public statement, Roy entered his office drained of nearly all his energy and finding one of the sources of his constant migraines comfortably lounging on his couch. Roy moved a bit sluggishly over to his chair. He sat down with a relived sigh.

Folding his hands under his chin, he acknowledged the admittedly handsome pain before him, "...Fullmetal..." He stated in a serious tone, "What on earth possessed you to do that?"

Edward shrugged casually, "This whole mess began with a public announcement, so I figured it should end with a public announcement."

Roy looked at him for a while, gauging the seriousness of his casual response, "...So you meant it?" He asked.

Edward looked at him slightly confused, "Yes. I did."

They were both silent for a bit before Roy finally leaned back in his chair. Sighing and letting out a soft, "...Damn"

Edward jumped up off the couch in fury, "WHAT! YOU STILL WANTED TO TRY FUCKING WITH ME YOU DAMN BASTARD! AFTER EVERY FUCKING THING I'VE BEEN THOUGH YOU THINK I WOULD STILL BE FUCKING GAY! GAAAAHH!"

"...Why didn't you wait for me at the crime scene?" Roy responded simply, deciding not to aggravate the blond any further if he could help it.

Edward flushed slightly at this, his face looking slightly mortified. He was silent for a long moment, which caused Mustang to really wonder what the heck had caused this. He finally responded, "...You... wouldn't believe me if I told you..."

Roy raised his eyebrow. Deciding that he could maybe get the information when Fullmetal was less emotionally unstable, he asked a different question, "And what happened at the Devil's Nest?"

Falling into a familiar routing, Fullmetal gave a report on the events that occurred from the moment Envy revealed himself to Ed, until the moment when Ed made the phone call with Roy. He wouldn't budge further then admitting he had in fact been planning on waiting there until Roy arrived, but something both unbelievable and unexpected had happened. Finally Roy dismissed him ready to get started on the paperwork he had to fill out on the events of the investigation.

Roy looked at the first page. He then let his head fall to the desk and moaned, "...I hate paperwork..."

Meanwhile, the moment Edward exited the office Riza called out to him, "Edward?"

Ed looked over at Riza, "Riza?" He questioned back.

"Could I speak with you in private for a moment?"

"...Sure"

The two of them exited the office to move to a more private area of the headquarters. Riza spoke quietly so that no one would hear her, "Edward." She started in a very serious voice, "I would like to inform you that I have considered running for Fuhrer myself."

"..." Edward looked at her in a funny way. "...And why are you telling me this?"

"Edward, I would like you to help me take over the world as my business partner. I have plans on improving and expanding this country, and I know you could help me do it. I'm not asking for any kind of emotional involvement, and I'm only hoping that you will consider this."

"...Why me?" He asked with curiosity and suspicion.

"You are famous everywhere Edward. And I need someone with lots of public influence to help me on my rise to power."

"..." Edward took a moment to look past the outright ridiculousness of the situation he was placed in and gave it some serious consideration.

"...Well... I was looking for something to do with me life, something of relevance. I was hoping to find love and a nice quiet future. But... since that failed maybe working on improving the country is the next best thing? ...I guess Riza. I'll be your business partner. ...But what about Roy?"

"I know of a general who will have me quickly promoted, and you can transfer under my command. Once I pull out all the stops, even Roy won't be able to turn against me."

'...That sounded far more mincing then any man should hear...' Edward thought with an inner shudder, going to a hotel to sleep off his horrible day.

_She used Ed as her public persuasion, and her own frighteningly precise means of none public persuasion to rise in power. Riza ran a successful campaign that gained her the title of Fuhrer Hawkeye. With General Elric at her side the two of them conquered a bit less then half of the world with their partner country, Xing. The two of them lived as happily as two non-married business partners could live._

_The End._

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><p>AN: I'm hoping you liked the ending well enough. Even though I'm guess it would be anyone's stretch as a potential ending to Fullmetal, but I liked it. And I'm hoping that you all like it as well.<p>

This is the official ending to Got to Love Ed. But, I did promise some omakes and they will be provided. ~ So, next week I'm going to throw two extras out there for the price of one. Why? Because one is too short to not just throw in as an extra. After that there is one more extra chapter that will come out after that, and its going to probably be the best/funniest ending. (Hopefully anyway.) It's the one with Armstrong playing a part in it.

I do thank all my readers who made it to the end. I'm going to call this a completed story now and hope that you like my extra chapters that are lurking around to be revealed. Have a pleasant day everyone.


	10. Ending 2

AN: I would recommend watching FMA Chibi Party. It does contain some spoilers of the ending to the FMA original anime series, but if you're ok with some spoilers then I say go for it. The biggest spoiler there anyway is... oops, almost wrote it out loud. Here let me put up more of a warning. Spoiler Alert: *whisper* Envy was a dragon. :D

I guess you can call me a hypocrite. I had thought of this story being a bit of a continuation from the manga, but the fact that it's my crazy mind in control a few things did get warped around a bit. Fist is that originally Ed was all gung ho about killing Envy, then you remember the Greed original ending?

This Riza takes over the world thing was kind of just an ending cap that I had no idea what would make it sound better. Didn't want to write a whole other ending... or did I? Presenting, the omakes additional three plus ending spectacular! Just pick on you like best, next week when the fourth and final ending that some of you have been waiting for shows up, I am out of this story like lightening.

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><p><strong>Omake 1 – The 'Potential' RoyXEd Ending ~<strong>

Edward was walking through the hallway carrying Riza's paperwork to her office. Thankfully it wasn't as big as Mustang's pile had been, otherwise she could have found some other lackey to play pack mule for her. This whole world takeover thing wasn't all that bad all and all.

'Already improvements were being made in the west, the south was slowly getting over it, and though we all knew better then to bother with Drachma, they were finally backing off now that we were an obviously bigger and more powerful nation. Riza's so called 'peaceful' campaign is surprisingly living up to its name. Good job Furor Riza, you're probably not going to be murdered in your sleep.'

Rounding a corner, Edward saw his old boss Mustang chatting with some of the other Colonels. Trying not to get noticed, Edward held the paperwork in front of his face, moving forward at a normal pace. There was no such luck when it came to Mustang though.

"Edward!" Edward stopped with a jerk, "Long time no see."

Edward turned around and grumbled, "What do you want Mustang."

"Oh nothing, I was just wondering..." He got a small smirk on his face, "Why you've never carried my paperwork to me? In an obedient manor, I might add. It looks good on you Fullmetal."

Edward blushed, "Fuck off Mustang."

Smiling, Mustang continued, "Aww not going to yell at me? You might hurt my feelings."

Ed huffed, sticking his nose up a bit, "Unlike you obviously, I'm actually trying to grow up, Mustang." He turned around and continued towards Riza's office.

"Well, it's obvious to anyone that you have grown up quite a bit. Not quite so short anymore, huh Fullmetal?" It seemed like Mustang insisted on being an annoyance for a while.

Edward grit his teeth, ignoring the man in the hopes he would go away. "Well, that is impressive," Mustang continued, "You really are controlling yourself quite well. You might become a man yet Fullmetal."

Edward turned around violently to do something to the pain, only to stop from the look that was in his eyes. Something that made Ed feel slightly lightheaded. "Don't be a stranger Fullmetal," Mustang finished off, walking around Ed and moving on down the hallway.

Edward stood there a moment trying to collect himself, '...What the fuck was that...'

He blushed slightly. Then, he turned around and yelled out down the hall while moving forward, "Hey Bastard! Hold on a second!"

_The End._

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><p>AN: And yes, this is where it cuts off. Just a little something that you the audience wanted. I hope you liked it, even if it was short. And next week is going to be the fourth and final ending that is probably my personal favorite ending. It's going to be quite funny I believe.<p> 


	11. Ending 3

AN: Story Warning. This ending is a bit of a EdXWinry troll. For those of you who want to spare yourselves the effort of reading this very small chapter, which was made 'just because', can simply wait till next week where the final extra chapter will be released and in my opinion the story will have been completed enough to put a final end on it.

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><p>Edward Elric woke up in the middle of the night, sweating like crazy from the terrible dream he had during the night. "...What the hell..." He whispered, "I'm not even gay..."<p>

"Edward?" A sleepy voice coming from his right asked quietly.

"...Sorry I woke you up Winry..." He apologized, looking fondly at the sleepy Winry.

"It's alright Ed," She said snuggling up to his side, "Go back to sleep, ok."

"...Yah..."

At the hesitation in his voice, Winry questioned, "Was it a bad dream?"

"...No," Edward replied a bit unsure, "...it was... really weird. Don't worry about it... I love you Winry," He added, wrapping his arms around her.

She smiled, "I love you too Ed."

_The End._

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><p>AN: Yes, welcome to the 'it was all a dream' ending. Once I thought of it, it had to be created. In no way do I consider this an ending that is desirable, just plausible really. Have a nice night everyone.<p> 


	12. Ending 4

AN: I came up with this story idea after the insistence of an Armstrong inclusion. So... you have entered the supposed 'true ending of this story'. Supposedly, this is what actually happened for the duration of the entire story, or if you'd rather another alternate ending. ~

Also, I apologies for any inconveniences. When I wrote this last chapter, I was almost finished with it right before I left for a trip. I was feeling a bit rushed and down, and well, I decided that rather then posting something that might be unfinished, I'd rather wait till I come back. When I did come back however, I had lost my will to continue writing and have been so until hopefully now. This will be the end of this series, and hopefully I can continue writing on here. Have a wonderful day.

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><p><em>Edward was wondering the hallway's of Central's military headquarters. The halls were however deserted, to which Ed assumed to be due to the fact that it was, 'ridiculously early in the morning to be at fucking work!' He had recently been tricked into reinstating into the military by Mustang, which pissed him off to no end, and was doomed to be his lackey once again until his new contract ended.<em>

"Fuck Mustang and his fucking life and his fucking job," Edward grumbled sleepily as he continued making his way down the hall.

He entered Mustang's office area to find that not even Hawkeye was there at the moment. "Gez, he's even got Hawkeye running around for him already. Why do the other men get to sleep in, and I have to be here on time anyway?" He continued to grouch as he opened the door to Mustang's office.

He entered to find that it was empty as well. "...Did the Bastard forget to tell me it was a holiday or something... If that's the case someone's going to get a fist to the face." He ended with a growl.

He started stomping his way back to the main entrance. He was going to fucking go back to sleep like a sane human, and then he was going to hunt down Mustang and make him pay for loosing his precious sleep in time. When he turned a corner however, there were at least a dozen people walking down the hallway.

Ed was about to ask them why they were all gathered together, when he noticed something strange about the men. They were all moving real slowly forward, a bit twitchy too. He was staring at them like the weirdoes they were, until something really fucking strange happened.

When they noticed Ed standing in front of them, they lifted their arms up in front of them, started moving a bit faster towards him, and the group moaned out in almost unison, "Eeeedwaard..." Which sent shivers down Ed's spine.

"...Wha... What the hell!" Ed yelled out as he turned and ran away from the psychos. "If this is a joke or something, someone is going to fucking pay for this!"

He ran into the cafeteria only to find that he was now surrounded, it seemed that everyone one in the building was acting like a mindless corpse. They began to circle him. Edward put his hands up quickly ready to beat the hell out of anyone that came too close to him.

They inched ever closer, their arms before them, and moaning out his name. Ed tensed, 'What the hell is going on!?"

"Edward!" Upon hearing Armstrong shout out from behind him, Edward spun around feeling the usual dread, mixed in with some hope. Armstrong was shirtless, posed with one knee on the ground, and flexing inside the horde of seemingly mindless people. He stood up, struck another pose, and spoke out in his usual loud voice, "Edward! Become an Armstrong, Edward! It would be a great honor for you to be betrothed to an Armstrong!"

Ed stood there stock-still, speechless and horrified at what he hoped was a strange turn to a terrifying nightmare. Armstrong made another pose continuing his speech uninterrupted, "This is the Armstrong courting method passed down through the Armstrong family line for generations!" He began to flex his chest muscles, "Are you not simply dazzled by the beauty of these muscles!? This pure and perfectly sculpted view? And it all for you to gaze upon Edward, does it not leave you speechless?"

Edward remained in a stunned silence. Even the horde that was slowly closing in was not even close to the true terror he had been forced to witness. Just when it seemed like he would in fact be laid hands upon by the masses, a ring of fire surrounded him, both knocking the sense back into him and driving the frontline of people backwards.

Edward quickly looked to the source to find Mustang posed to light another line of fire. "This way Ed, quickly!"

Ed did not need a second prompt. Charging forward through the parted horde, he and Mustang ran through the halls quickly making for the exit. They continued to make their way through Central till they got to a bridge that was far, far away from the military headquarters. Mustang came to an abrupt stop, and Edward stopped with him.

The wind was blowing lightly through their hair, but Ed's sole focus was not on the lovely day surrounding them but rather on that of an immediate explanation, "Mustang! What the hell was that!?"

Mustang ran a hand through his hair, "Well, I was called in a bit earlier then usual about a secret project that the higher ups in the military were having developed. Naturally I could not say no."

"Naturally," Ed snorted.

Mustang continued undaunted, "It was a strong pheromone mixture still in development, the hopes were that it could be used to cause a distraction in battle or to be used in integrations perhaps. Not something I would need of course," He smirked.

Edward rolled his eyes, "Keep talking Mustang," he egged on.

"Well...," Mustang looked a bit frustrated, "Thankfully, I was at the back of the room when it happened. Some klutz knocked over one some of the beakers, apparently it was mixed in with a sample of your DNA and released into the air. The men who were near it breathed it in and well, you saw what happened. I ran away quickly before I could be affected. At the time I did not imagine how far the pheromones would spread."

"...How the hell did they get my DNA..."

"...The closer people were to the outbreak starting point, the more effected they were by the pheromones, blinded by lust and a numbing effect that was made to quickly subdue the enemy."

"...Armstrong did not seem too different..." Ed shuddered at the thought.

"He most likely had just walked through the door. That is the only reasonable explanation I can think up for that one." He shrugged lightly and walked over to lean against the side of the bridge, looking out at Central's view. "Go home Edward, I will call you when it seems like the effects have worn off. Should not be more then a day..."

Edward put his hands in his pockets, "...Thanks...for the help Mustang..."

Mustang turned around and smiled, "Anytime Ed."

Edward turned around and started walking, 'Gez, it is a good thing that was contained for the most part, who knows how much problems that would have caused if it had been released. ...It's a good thing Mustang managed to get away from it or whatever... Yep, a really good thing...'

Edward ignored the slight warmth he felt on his face and moved faster. He was going to stay at a hotel tonight, not wanting to risk sneaking into the military living quarters. '...Fucking military... can not wait till my contract ends again...'

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><p>AN: Yep, this is the 'Zombie Apocalyptic like' ending. Why? Because it just came to me. I hoped you liked it anyway. And have a great day everyone.<p> 


End file.
